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       Today is January 15, 2011 and the truth is
that I remembered Drahuša,   so I thought she was
actually my first love,  because there are always
several of the first,              because we are
opportunistic bastards   and especially where the
females wander,    there is an eternal war on all
fronts,       everything can always be different:
coincidences, seconds, decisive moments:     that
send us in certain directions    - how good it is
that no one knows everything.  (Or I'm not a good
man at all.)
       They had a window into our garden        -
a view in our vineyard      and our scrubby apple
trees and had a daughter, she was much older than
me - I was about seven      - and she was already
learning to be a shop assistant or a tailor   and
she was a tough guy.
       Maybe I'm  a little submissive since then,
it is exciting to feel the superiority  - that is
so high, that admits no doubts,  just carries you
on hands  (puts you on her knees .. no no, that's
another story) and knows well where.
       We had a secret, once I caught her sitting
in the window to our garden and smoking, yes, our
secret was cosmic - it was cigarettes Mars.
       Apparently,   I did not captivate her with
my excessive maturity,     but maybe a little bit
later - I will hope for it now.      Especially I
didn't betray her - then we went cycling together
to Park,  she had a purple bike with a carrier on
which you could stand        and grab her knitted
shoulders.
       When we found some bike for me,        she
pedaled slowly aristocratically before me,  by no
means I dared to overtake her,       already when
I went next to her    - I admit: I indulged  that
delight several times  - I felt too blissful  and
something tickled in my belly.
      She took out Mars in the park and we talked
- I asked:  how should I walk , to breathe,  eat,
listen, and nodding - how the goddesses recommend
it - so that:         we don't summon their hard,
contemptuous  - terrible ticklish in belly - look
- with a little open mouth         - and with the
glistening on front teeth.
      Exactly the way a woman in a purple jacket
gaze at me in a few years,   but there's a little
bit of searching disillusionment in it     - yes,
it's me, but I'm ashamed, I don't greet you, I'll
disappear in a second,  I slip out along the side
bank of the sidewalk.




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