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        .. I guess: I was happy in a way: when I realized: that not only I never be able to
connect with the Doctor: but also in a crippled Ember:  two people will barely survive half
a year .. I'm not afraid .. in this story: I'm the likable anti-hero: who eventually has to
die: because it would be immoral: if he survived  .. oh .. where is that dude Laco?  .. who
had no questions? Where did the tough guy go: with his essential: fuck off? .. Did he swear
constantly: because he felt no emotion?   .. I didn't swear  even in my head  for very long
time .. it's because of him .. the little one  .. as I walked down the corridor towards the
hatchery:  I couldn't shake the thought of that giant Solaris baby   .. I was afraid:  when
I'll open the door:  there will be something filthy and inhuman behind it:  but I had never
felt such love in my life:  as when the little boy  looked at me  for the first time  .. in
that moment I completelly forgave that sick bastard the Doctor for letting me kill them all
- so that his twisted inventions could live   .. I'm not afraid ..  only the thought scares
me: that I didn't leave soon enough ..